So much...

R: So much to try to recap... My head is spinning.

I already posted about our first kiss. I failed to mention that before that we went to church and talked to a homeless man, then his dad showed up and we went to Zaxby's. Then we cried in my dorm lobby until he left-- only to call me a bit later and inform me that he was going to be around until Tuesday night, instead of leaving that night for a few days.

Then we went to my classes the next day, then took a walk, then went to Walmart in the middle of the night to get my collar. That was pretty adventuresome in and of itself-- talk about a hard time getting a taxi.

Our collaring ceremony was nothing big, but then it was just my training collar. I knelt in front of him on a little stone bench in this gardeny area outside Walmart, and he put my collar on me. Then his dad picked us up and dropped me off at my dorm, and I put my groceries away and finally fell into the bed.

On my birthday, he called a few times, and I finally got out of bed around 12. My roommate had cleaned my room for me, which was amazing (the best birthday present she could have given me), so I just showered, got dressed, and took the trash from my room down to the van. I meant to dump it later, but I ended up leaving it in his car. We went to Claire's at the mall, then Dairy Queen, Taco Bell (to stabilize my blood sugar), and a few other places, I think... it's all kind of a blur.

We were supposed to meet my brother and grandmother (my grandmother rocks! She's a trekkie and likes LotR), but there was so much drama surrounding it... and then my mom called... and I was really tired and in pain because I was on my period. =( And J was dropping because he was scared. I was so dazed and out of it that I left him in the gazebo to go call my dad; if I had been more alert, I would have seen how badly off he was and not left him. But I did, and he went into the hole and scratched his arms-- deeply. I felt terrible when I found out, but I can't undo leaving him alone. Next time I'll try to be more alert to his needs, even if I'm not feeling excellent myself.

But we ended up going out to eat, and things were great... we took some pictures, got more ice cream, cried a lot... then we kissed and I got off several times, and J wanted some fun too, so we found a deserted street and I semi-climbed on top of him so he could get himself off... it was fun. And I got off several more times at that. Then we went back to the dorm to fold laundry, talk about the future, and generally engage in aftercare.

Finally it was time for us to part ways. we stood in the gazebo for a long while, holding each other, crying, listening to The Day it Rained Forever (Aurora) and 'dancing'-- clinging to each other and swaying a bit. =P We were wet and cold and dripping snot all over each other, but we didn't care. Then I walked him to his car, and God kept playing jokes for us-- knocking the umbrella out of our hands, dropping my shirt on the wet ground, making us laugh through our tears. I think J wants to write a more detailed entry about that, so I won't elaborate too much.

But as I reached my dorm, crying into his soggy Canada shirt, I heard him yell across the parking lot, "I love you!" I raised my hand to him, but I was sobbing so hard I couldn't say it back. Not to worry, though-- when he got on MSN later that night, I told him I loved him too.

It was a nice experience, all things considered. Previously, he thought he was broken because he couldn't cry. Now we know he's not. =) I miss him worse than I thought I would, but I'm also okay. We'll be alright. We have our webcams, and we have voice chat. We'll make it until we see each other again.

By the way, J, did you ever dump the trash I left in the front passenger seat of your van? oops... And don't forget to hide the black Valentine's Day present I gave you!

-R

posted by rjjr06 @ 6:44 PM Comments: 0